Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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