Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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