Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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