I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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