Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Randomize
