How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize