Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Randomize
