I don't think brook has ever known best
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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