Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize