You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Bring me that man meat
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
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