Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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