idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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