Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize