something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
