I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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