Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
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