Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk

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(415): View more from California

the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.

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(636): View more from Missouri

we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"

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(443): View more from Maryland

he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off

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19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Read it at the TFLN blog
(901): View more from Tennessee

Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.

(760): View more from California

Wow.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.

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(360): View more from Washington

I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.

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(867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no

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