I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
