OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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