Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
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