i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I deserve this hangover.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
