So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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