"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
