i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.