I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
