I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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