Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize