Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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