I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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