i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
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