i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize