...so i touched it.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
