my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
