Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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