im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I stole a fireplace last night.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
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