I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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