Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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