dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
