More tranny stories later!
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
