You made me cry and you don't even care
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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