yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
