Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
We had to coat check the pizza.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize