Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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