yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hippo gnu deer
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
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