so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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