Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
