DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i think i have herpe
just one?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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