Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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