better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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