I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
this will be a night to untag.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
