i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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