Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
the day after is always just damage control
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize